Tarnobrzeg to New York

Abraham Kirschenbaum was born in Tarnobrzeg,  in 1875. Tarnobrzeg was then in Austria, and it is now in Poland. Kirschenbaum in German means cherry tree.

 A copy of his birth certificate,  dated October 25, 1904, shows Abraham’s father is Naftuli (the t is not crossed), mother is Golde.

A copy of his marriage certificate, July 25, 1899, shows Abraham’s father is Nathion Kirschenbaum, his mother is Gussie Last.  His wife, Annie’s  father is Salamon Fleisher, her mother is Kadie Roshwalp.

A family tree prepared by Paul Shain (grandson of Jacob Kirschenbaum, brother of Abraham), lists the name as Natan Kirschenbaum.

My name Norman is named after my maternal  great-grandfather Naftuli (Nathion) (Natan) Kirschenbaum. My Jewish name is Naftuli. There is a Hebrew biblical name Naftalah, and  Naftuli is the same name in Yiddush.

The information in the record Live in the Fiddlers House by Itzhak Perlman, states the track Doina Naftule is “based on a 1923 recording by a fiery clarinet player Naftule Brandwein”. Naftule Brandwein, was born in 1889 in Galicia, came to the United States by 1913, was a kletzmer clarinetist, played mainly in the Catskills in New York.

Abe’s father died at a young age. Bea Shain told me that he, and his brother Jacob, were brought up by their grandmother, Hannah. Elsie Goldstein told me Abraham was brought up by his grandfather.

Abe had a very good Hebrew education at Cheder. Elsie said that he wanted to be Chazan (Cantor), and he studied for that in Europe.

He immigrated to the United States in 1897, at age 22, to New York City. He was sponsored by his brother Jacob.

“A ticket between Hamburg and New York cost $ 34., more than many Jews earned in a year, and for that sum one traveled in the dreaded class known as “steerage”. The trip was two weeks  by ship. There were double-decker iron beds and straw mattresses, cold seawater for washing, There was no dining area, toilet troughs, food was mainly hash. (Telushkin, 9)

Irving Howe wrote that steerage class was an ordeal. “They arrived exhausted – worn out physically by lack of rest, by poor food, by constant strain of close, cramped quarters. ( I Howe, 43)

Ellis Island was opened as the immigration center in New York City in 1892, previously it was on Castle Garden on an island west of the Battery. (I Howe, 43)  Abe and Annie, arrived in 1897, probably through Ellis Island.

Imagine an immigrant’s first view of the majestic Statue of Liberty, seen from Ellis Island.  “Shaken by having witnessed the hordes of eastern European Jews arriving in her city, Lazarus, a Jew born in New York City, wrote her famous poem as a tribute. The poem was inscribed at the base of the Statue of Liberty. (Telushkin, 13)  The New Colossus, by Emma Lazarus (1849-1887) , includes: “Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breath free, the wretched refuse of your teeming shore, Send these, the homeless, tempest-tost to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door”. The Statue was dedicated in  1886. The Stature of Liberty was in place for only 7 years when Abe and Annie arrived in  New York City in 1897

Soon after he arrived in New York City, he sent for his future wife, Annie Fleisher. She was born in 1875, and also lived in Tarnobrzeg. She immigrated to the U.S. in 1897, at age 22. Elsie said that when Annie first came to New York City, Abe got her a job cooking in the home of a wealthy family.

Abe and Annie were married July 1899, by Halamon Levitz, Cantor of Gation of Oheb, at Schwel Lodge,  65 Willow St., New York City. The witnesses were Max Schwartz and Joe Liberman. Abraham and Annie were both 23 at the time they were married.

 At that time Abraham lived at 49 Sheriff St., and Annie lived at 82 Columbia St., in the “lower east side” of  New York City. These two addresses, where they lived, and 65 Willow St., where they were married, are only one or two blocks apart.

The lower east side of  New York City was two square miles. In this area in 1881 there were 80,000 Jews, by 1901 there were 510,000 Jews there, making it the most densely populated area in the world at that time. (Telushkin, 9)

“The lower east side was the most densely populated area in the city…A dominant impression of the Jewish quarter, shared by immigrants and visitors alike, was of fierce congestion, a place in which the bodily pressures of other people, their motions  and smells and noises, seemed always to be assaulting one. Of space for privacy and solitude there was none”. (I Howe, 69-70)

The immigrants lived in tenements. The typical tenement was a 5 story building, small stores on the ground floor, and 4 floors of rooms above. They were built in rows of attached buildings. On the street, in front of the tenements, it was very crowded with push-carts, and people. “A 1908 census showed that …about 50 % slept 3 or 4 in a room, and nearly 25 % 5 or more in a room…Toilet facilities two to a floor at best.” (I Howe, 148) The bathrooms were shared by many people. Many tenement rooms had no window. (I Howe, 148-149)

Irving Howe wrote about the Lower East Side. “There is nothing glamorous about poverty, nothing admirable about deprivation, nothing enviable about suffering….Human beings should not have to live with the enforced austerities that many Jewish immigrants accepted as their lot. Life ought to be freer, more playful, more spontaneous than the immigrants  usually could or knew how to make it .” (645)  No wonder these immigrants told their grandchildren so little about their life in Europe, and in the Lower East Side of  New York.

Carolynn and I visited the Lower East Side in 1996. Sherif St,. Clinton St., and Willow St., are still there. These streets are close to the East River. These addresses are located to the side, and close to, the approach to the Williamsburg Bridge. The construction of the bridge was completed in December 1903. The Tenement buildings, that were there,  have been replaced by unattractive housing projects. The occupants are mostly African Americans. Only a few blocks away, there is still the Jewish presence: the small Jewish shops in a row along  Essix St. Across Hester St., where there are Ratner’s Deli, Katz’s Deli. etc.  The movie Crossing Delancy Street was located in the Lower East Side.

Abe and Annie’s first child, Sarah, was born in 1900. At that time they were living at 82 Columbia St., which was Annie’s address before she and Abe were married. Sarah’s Birth Certificate states that her father was age 24, and her mother age 22. This is different than their marriage certificate, which states that they were both age 23 when they were married.

Abraham received his U.S. citizenship June 17, 1902. Abe and Annie’s two other children were born in New York City: Ruth in 1904, and Elsie in 1906. His daughters, and later their children, called Abe “papa”. Friends, and other family members, called him Abe.

Abe became a woman’s tailor in New York City.

Abe became active in organizing the Ladies’ Garment Workers Union (ILGWU). The Union was organized in 1900. Working conditions were terrible, and the workers were exploited. That Union had 2300 members in 1900, and grew to 9,000 members by 1903. There was a depression in 1907 – 1908. There was a strike in 1910, and it led to the improvement of a previous work week of six days and  54 hours..

Abe became interested in Socialism. Irving Howe wrote about Socialism and the Unions in New York City. In World of Our Fathers: “Life in the American cities was hard, work exhausting, the imperative of daily need overwhelming. Suppose you thought of yourself as a socialist …. That meant going to an occasional lecture, being prepared to join a strike when it erupted, reading the Forward, joining the Workmen’s Circle (the socialist fraternal order). The Forward was founded in 1897, as a Jewish Socialist daily newspaper printed in Yiddush, had a ciculation of about 150,000 in the early 1900’s. He said most did not join the Socialist Party, which took a higher amount of organization activity. (289) “By 1904 , when there were about 200,000 workers in the New York /garment industries, the vast majority were unorganized and few of the unions were more than skeletal groups”. (289)  In How We Lived:  The Jewish socialists… Where they did their best work, making a permanent contribution to both Jewish life and American society, was in building the Jewish trade unions, mostly in the garment industries. (161)

After awhile he opened his own tailor shop in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. There were some disturbing  anti-semitic incidents against him there. Abraham, with this family, moved back to New York City.

Abraham’s brother is Jacob. He was born in 1867, 8 years before Abraham. Jacob married Pauline Breit, who was also born in 1867. Jacob and Pauline immigrated to the United States from Tarnobrzeg before Abe.

San Francisco

By 1900, Jacob and Pauline Kirschenbaum were living in San Francisco at 639 Natoma Street. Their children, two had been born in New York and three in San Francisco are:

• Max, born 1894 (New York)

• Rachel, born 1896 (New York)

• Rebecca (Bea),  born 1899 or 1900 (San Francisco)

• Gussie, born 1901 (San Francisco)

• Saddie, born 1908 (San Francisco)

Later Jacob and Pauline’s children married:  

• Rachel and Jack Lowenstein,  

• Bea and Lou Shain,

• Gussie and Harold Horn,

• Saddie and Irwin Cheim.

• Max and his girlfriend Adelaide didn’t marry.

Jacob and Pauline in 1910 were living in San Francisco at 26 Harriet Street. In 1920 they were living at the same address.

Jacob was a tailor, and later his son Max was in business with him. Jake’s first business was children’s clothing, and later it was men’s clothing. Bea later became a bookeeper. Abe, Annie, and their children, called him “Uncle Jake”, and called Pauline “Auntie Perrela”. Jacob and Pauline were living in San Francisco at the time of the biggest  earthquake 4/13/06.

When Abe and Annie, and their children, moved to San Francisco, they stayed in Jacob and Pauline’s apartment, for 6 months. They were 4 adults and 8 children, in one small apartment. (Bea)

Abe, and Jake, were very different. Abe was observantly religious, clean and neat, reserved, quiet, studious, and very dedicated to good health.  Bea said “Jacob had a twinkle in his eye”. Jake was overweight, smoked a cigar, and was not religious.

The 1911 City Directory listed Abraham Kirschenbaum, Abraham, Tailor, 20c Moss. Kirshchenbaum, Jacob, Tailor, r.26 Harriet. The 1923 City Directory listed Kirschenbaum, Abraham, (Annie), 2nd hnd gds, 743a Howard, r 161 Russ, Ruth Steno, Sarah with Emporium.

When they lived on Russ St.  one of the families in the same building was Tom Mooney. On July 22, 1916, a bomb exploded during the Preparedness Parade, and six people were killed, at Mission and Stuart Sts.. The purpose of the parade was to encourage American participation in World War I. Tom Mooney, and Warren Billings, two well know anti-war and union activists, were arrested, and sentenced to death, commuted to life in 1918, and freed by Governor Olson in 1939.  Years later, the nearby realtor who leased me the office in San Mateo, was Mr. Reynolds, and working in his office were Mrs. Anderson, and her sister-in-law Mrs. Warren Billings. 

Abe opened a women’s tailor shop in San Mateo. It was located on B Street, which was the main business street near the train station.

M. Poster, in San Mateo A Centennial History, is a good history of San Mateo. The early inhabitants of San Mateo, were first the Indians, then the Spanish, and next the Mexicans. It was a stagecoach stop from 1849-1865, and a train stop beginning in 1863. Between 1900 and 1910 the populations of San Mateo doubled to 4,384, and in 1920 was 5,979.  (137)

San Mateo’s most successful families, at that time, included , Polhemus, Whipple, Wisnom, Tilton, Howard, Parrrot, Hayward, Taylor, Donald Byrnes, Goodspeed, Borel, Bromfield, and Gianini (39-54).. There was one prominent Jewish family, the Levy Brothers, who were merchants on the Coast, had a stagecoach from the Coast to San Mateo, and a store in San Mateo,  they came to San Mateo County in 1869, from the French Rhineland. (103) The name Abraham Kirschenbaum was strange to the people who were well established in San Mateo at that time.

“At the turn of the century, San Francisco had a sizable Jewish population that included some of the most important businessmen in the West...Since they could not join the Burlingame Club, they started a Club of their own”(116)  In 1911 they started the Beresford Country Club, later named the Peninsula Golf and Country Club. Some of the organizers were M J Brandenstien of M.J.B. Coffee, Herbert and Mortimer Fleischacker, Walter Hass, I.W. Hellman of Wells Fargo Bank, Jess Lilienthal, Morris Meyerfield of the Orpheum Theatres, George Roos, and Sigmund Stern. (116) These people could not get into the Burlingame Club, which was blatant anti-Semitic. Jews were not accepted for membership in the Elks Lodge, which was established in San Mateo in 1910,  until the 1960’s, after the B’nai B’rith Anti Defamation League, and other organizations, for a long time complained about their discrimination.

The 1920 Census states that Abe was a proprietor of a second-hand store.

When Sarah married Mayer Licht, June 14, 1925, they bought a new home in Westwood Highlands, 320 Colon Ave., S.F.

Abraham and Annie moved into Sarah and Mayer’s home. Downstairs there was a full garage, with a large social hall, which was their bedroom, with a roll-away bed. There was a bathroom off the garage. There was a long custom built table, which was for the exclusive use of Abe. His sewing machine was under the table, which could be moved forward. The table could be used for cutting of material etc., when occasionally, he did sewing for his immediate family, especially for Annie. Abe kept the table top very neat, without any clutter.

I was born 3/30/27, at  Mount Zion Hospital. The hospital then was small in size, located at the South East corner of the block, now offices. The hospital later gradually grew, to occupy the entire square block.

The stock market crashed in 1929, and led to the Depression.  Abe owned some stock, and it lost all its value. He never bought any stock again. After that, he never played cards, other games, or gambled.  Much later, when I was of age, I went to Tahoe, gambled a little, and lost. Abe said that was good. My mother explained that he meant, because I lost, I wouldn’t be anxious to gamble again.

Abraham’s last job was working in the warehouse of the Public Food Stores, the very large grocery chain of Joe Lanfeld, who was the brother-in-law of Sarah and Mayer. The corporation closed in the Depression.  Then Abe retired, about 1930, at the age of 55.

There is a photograph of Abe and Annie, probably near the time of their wedding, in which he has a dark, well trimmed, goatee beard. Later his hair thinned a little, and was grey. He was medium height, and stood very erect. He was never overweight, had muscular arms and legs, and a large chest. Carolynn thought he looked a little like Ben Gurion, with less hair.

He didn’t like the business world. Sarah said he should have been a doctor. What she meant was the doctors of that time were very devoted to service, making house calls, and building a personal relationship with their patients. The business aspects were secondary at that time. .

Abe was not active socially. He didn’t go out of the home for entertainment. This was a contrast, that whenever a friend of his, or a friend of Sarah and Mayer, was sick, he would go to the hospital, or their home, to visit them. It is a mitzvah (commandment), in Judaism, to visit the sick. He would also go to funerals, and the cemetery if he could get there, for his friends and friends of Sarah and Mayer. It is also a mitzvah to bury the dead.

I only remember him going to one movie. That was Emil Zola, which starred Paul Muni. Abe was interested in the subject matter of this movie.  In 1894 Captain Alfred Dreyfus, Jewish, an officer on the French general staff, was accused of spying for Germany. Dreyfus was convicted, partly on forged evidence, and sentenced for life on Devil’s Island. Emil Zola, a writer, fought for justice for Dreyfus. A decade later he was declared completely innocent of the charges. Theodore Herzl, a journalist from Vienna, attended the trial, and concluded assimilation was no protection against anti-semitism. In 1894, he published his book, The Jewish State: A Modern Solution to the Jewish Question. That lead to formation to the Zionist Organization one year later.

There were some memorable things that I did with Abe. When I was about 10, the family went to Yosemite, my first time there. Abe and I climbed the rocks at the foot of Yosemite Falls, which was very exciting for me.

In 1939, the opening day of the Golden Gate Bridge, Abe and I walked across the bridge, and back. There were very many people walking on the bridge, and it was a great celebration.

The Social Hall had a crank-up phonograph, with a metal needle. It played 78 records. Abe had many Yiddush and Hebrew records, such as the famous Cantors of the 30’s Later I had a collection of swing records by the big bands of the 40’s.

Sarah had several jobs during World War II. Annie did a lot of the cooking for the family. Annie would take care of me and Carolyn, when Sarah or Mayer went to parties at friends’ homes, or B’nai B’rith, or Temple Beth Sholom events.

Annie was quiet, kind, smiled a lot, happy, content to be at home a lot. I think she was happiest when her three daughters got together with her, as they often did. Sarah would play the piano, Ruth and Elsie would sing. Or they would talk and laugh a lot, having fun just being together.

Annie sometimes took me with her when she went shopping on Mc Allister St. This included Gidalyah’s butcher shop, where the chickens were alive in cages, and some were running around the open yard. You picked out the chicken, and they killed it according to Kosher rules. Another stop was nearby Dropkin’s fish store, with all the fresh fish displayed on tables.

Abe was very interested in health maintenance, and in this, he was way ahead of most people at that time. He was a great walker, walking long distances, such as to and from downtown San Francisco, over Portola Drive, from 320 Colon Ave.  Later, when I was on the bus going up the hill from the street car station, I would see Abe walking along that route. He walked quickly, with long steps, and did deep breathing as he walked. He taught me to deep breath using the diaphragm. In 2000 I read that there was new evidence that deep breathing, while mild exercising, resulted in lost weight.

He didn’t smoke. His only drinking, was Manishevitz wine, on Sabbath, Passover, and othe Jewish holidays.. He had a unique diet, and never strayed from it. He would each large portions of one or two food items at a meal, such as boiled white fish from a very large bowl. He ate large amounts of vegetables, and fruit. He never ate meat or fowl. This was probably for two reasons: health, and because he was kosher. Eating no meat is a higher level of Kashrut than eating only Kosher meat. He had a healthy diet.

This was a contrast to the food that the rest of the family ate, which was delicious, and unhealthy. For instance, pot roast, holashchas (stuffed cabbage), cheeze blintzes, zwiebela and eyea (onions and eggs, scrambled), chicken liver, chicken schmaltz (fat), grieven (fried chicken schmaltz). On Sundays Mayer would shop at a deli, which he loved to do, and the family, except Abe, ate corned beef, swiss cheese, kippured cod, and Waxman’s rye bread baked on McAllister Street.

Abe loved to sunbathe, and was very tan. He would lie in the sun, in a bathing suit, for a long time, when there was sun instead of San Francisco fog. At that time, nobody knew that sunshine was harmful.

He studied Yoga, for the health benefits. One book that he read was The Complete Works of the Swami Vivekananda, , Volume 6. I have that book. I sometimes saw him sitting on the floor in the Yoga position.

He was very interested in current news, he often read newspapers and listened to the radio. He closely followed the activities of the U.S. Congress. He continued his interest in Socialism, such as the speeches and writings of  Norman Thomas. He, and the rest of the family, were great fans of F.D.R. I remember Abe listening to the “fireside chats” by Roosevelt on the radio. Abe was listening to the news on the radio, when the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor, and came out to tell us the surprising news. I didn’t know the location of Pearl Harbor.  I remember Mayer, Sarah, Ruth, Nate, were sitting in front of the garage door, and I was cutting the front lawn. Nate was in the National Guard, so he immediately called his unit, and they told him to rush down to the Golden Gate Bridge, to guard it. I often wondered how he was going to do that if the bridge had been attacked.

Observing Judaism was a very important basis of Abe’s life. I was fortunate to witness that for so many years, and I felt it gave him a deep peace of mind. For many years he conducted the services at the Jewish Home For The Aged, on Silver Ave., before they had a Rabbi on the staff. There was a nice chapel in the original building. He would walk, to and from the Home, to Colon Ave., which was a very long walk.

When he acted as a Cantor at the Jewish Home for the Aged, it was two blessings. He led those present in prayer, and he did a mitzvah (commandment) to help the aged. There is a prayer read on Yom Kippur: do not abandon me in my old age. Hineni, the Hazzan’s prayer, includes: “Awesome and majestic God, I beseech You to help me, As I  seek mercy for myself,  And for those who have sent me.” Later in the Yom Kippur Service, the Cantor chants “With hope I come before the Lord to plead, I ask for the gift of expression, So that here, before the congregation, I may sing of God’s power, And celebrate in song, the glory of God’s works.”

In his later years he conducted Services, on the high holidays, at Maimonodes Center across the street from Mount Zion Hospital. Carolynn and I, went to visit him at Services there in 1951, after we were married and were in the Air Force in Sacramento.

When conducting Services in the high holidays, he dressed in a long white robe, wore a high shaped white Yarmulka. He wore white fabric and crepe sole shoes, to not mix wool and leather  according to the commandment. I think the dress was symbolic of the importance he gave to his conducting the Services.

Abe sewed his white robe and high white Yamulkia. One time he sewed one for Rabbi White of Beth Sholom He sewed a  black silk Yamulka for me for my Bar Mitzva, which I still have. He carefully made a size for a good fit.

He had a strong voice, had a melodious chant, and clear pronunciation. He read the Torah, and he blew the Shofar (ram’s horn).

All my life, when I go to Synagogue, there are many times I remember Abe, because of the observances that I saw him do: i.e. when the cantor bows down to the floor for one prayer, and then is assisted to get up. When I see an all Hebrew prayer book on yellowing paper, a full size tallis, tfillen, etc. When in the Oshamru (we have trespassed) prayer on Rosh Hashona and Yom Kippur, the congregant pounds his chest with his clenched fist, for each sin that is recited. I see Abe doing this strongly, and enthusiastically, like all his observances. This prayer says “we have…”, and the prayer is for everyone in the Jewish community.

Often he would attend an orthodox Shul, on Webster St., San Francisco. To go there for the holidays, he would rent a room nearby, to be closer. He walked to and from the Shul the long distance from Colon Avenue.

I vividly remember one time that I went to visit him at the Webster St. Shul. It was an orthodox Service .Only men were on the main floor, draped in the large black and off-white tallises, praying from books all in Hebrew. No one called out the page, because they always knew.  Each person dovoned in a little different speed and a little different melody, but the same prayer. That created the typical droning sound, that is so different than Conservative or Reformed Services.  I was impressed, because it seemed to be the real Judaism of thousands of years.

When I would see him on a Jewish holiday, he shook my hand, and said “good yontif”, and he did it with a real enthusiasm, and sincerity. His handshake was firm, and a little longer than usual. He didn’t kiss me, or the family, thinking it wasn’t good hygiene.

The most memorable Jewish holiday was Passover. Abe conducted the Seder from the head of the table. Annie would bring Abe a bowl with water, so that he could wash his hands. He had a large white pillow behind him, to symbolize reclining, as in one of the “four questions”. He wore a white robe, a high fitted Yarmalka. Under the robe he wore a suit and tie. The service started with Kiddush said individually by Abe, Mayer, Nate, and me. I used the same melody as Abe which he had taught me. Mayer, and Nate, rapidly read the Kiddush, with a little different pronunciation, that each had learned in Europe. Fred did not read Hebrew, but he always attended the Seder, which showed the importance, because Fred often missed other family outings, for golf, hunting, etc. . Abe would read, out loud, mostly chanting, every word of the small size traditional  Hagaddah, all in Hebrew, except for the English translation of the four questions by the youngest child present. The Hagadah had photos with titles in English that conveyed the story. Abe would Chant much of the Service, and other parts would be read in Hebrew by Mayer and Nate along with Abe. After dinner, the Seder continued, including the songs, using Abe’s melodies.

During the meal, Fred would often have one or more jokes, and all the adults would laugh, including Abe. We had our own traditions. For instance, Nate would drink the chicken soup first, then put horse-raddish on the matzah ball, and eat it that way. Everyone would kid him about it, but he did it his way year after year.

From the time we were young children, Carolyn, Arlene, Gail, and I  would quietly sit at the table through the long Seder. We knew it was a very  important family event.

There was another aspect of Abe’s observance of Judaism. Colon Ave., where we lived, was far away from any Synagogue. He couldn’t get to a minyin of 10 Jews to pray. Abe said his daily prayers by himself. In the morning  he put on his large tallis, tfillen, faced the East, and dovoned. He held  his all Hebrew prayer book in his hands, as supposed to do, even though he didn’t need the book. He didn’t need the English translation, because  he knew the meaning of the Hebrew. He said his daily prayers at the other times, which he would do very quickly.

Rabbi Steinsaltz, The Thirteen Petalled Rose, wrote about the prayers: “Daily life is marked off by three principal sessions  of prayer. The prescribed body of prayer is, except for minor differences, the same for each session. Shaharit, the morning prayer, is recited before all activity is begun; the Minha afternoon prayer, before the sun sets; and the Maariv evening prayer, in the night….The morning prayer, with its requirement that one don phylacteries and its additional selections for reciting, lasts longer than the others (116)

The daily prayer, and other Services,  includes this passage in the bible, and it appears immediately following the Shema prayer “Hear O Israel: the Lord is our God, the Lord is One”. V’Hafta :You shall love the Lord your god with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your might. You shall take to heart these words which I command you this day. You shall teach them diligently to your children, speaking of them when you are at home and when you are away, whey you like down at night and when you rise up in the morning. You shall bind them as a sign upon your arm, and they shall be a reminder above your eyes. You shall inscribe them on the doorposts of you home and on your gates. (Deuteronomy 6:4-9) I know Abe sincerely tried to carry out these commandments.

The Ahavat Olam blessing, said shortly before the V’Hafta, includes “when we lie down and when we rise up we shall speak of Your commandments and rejoice in Your Torah and Mitzvot. For they are our life and the length of our days: on them we will meditate day and night. May Your love never depart from us. Praised are You, O Lord, who loves Your people Israel”.  Thus also reminds me of Abe, for whom Judaism was his life and the length of his days. (Mahzor Hadash, 410)

Abe didn’t tell the family how they should observe Judaism, but rather taught be setting an example. Later when Carolynn was pregnant with Diane, he advised her not to fast for Yom Kippur that year, because health takes precedent.

Abe was my teacher, preparing me for my Bar Mitzvah. He used a method of repetition, as he had learned in Europe. The book for my studies was all in Hebrew, with no English translation. I started first learning the  Hebrew letters, then the marks like notes, then sentences, then the melody. He taught me daily, for years, up to one hour at a time. This seemed natural to me, because I was used to repetitive practicing of music, such as scales and exercises, and difficult melodies. When I had my Bar Mitzvah, I read the Torah portion, the Haftorah, and conducted the Musaf Service. The Bar Mitzvah was at Temple Beth Sholom, on 14 th Ave., San Francisco, March, 1940.

In the evening there was a dinner party at the Empire Hotel. The Empire Hotel is a high rise of traditional architecture. It was prominent in the skyline at that time. In later years it was converted to be a federal building. At the dinner I played  the clarinet accompanied by Carolyn on piano. Those present were mostly family, and friends of Mayer and Sarah. I am glad that three of my grandparents were at my Bar Mitzvah.

Abe usually did not like to give gifts, nor receive gifts. He did give me a cash present for my Bar Mitzvah, which was a big amount for the time. When Ron was born he gave us a large de-luxe baby carriage, later also used for Diane.

He wrote a card for my Bar Mitzvah, in his own handwriting. He wished I would continue my Judaism after my Bar Mitzvah. I did not find the card until after 1997, when I retired. That was a coincidence, because after retirement Carolynn and I attended Synagogue more often, and studied Judaism more that we had done before.

I remember one time, Carolynn and I and Ron, came from the Air Force in Sacramento, and went to visit Abe, when he was living at the Sunset home of Elsie and Fred. Ron was about 6 months old. We were sitting on the driveway in front of the garage. Abe lifted Ron high in the air, and then lowered him. He did this many times, and each time Ron laughed, and Abe laughed. They were big happy laughs. Passover was near, and it was to be either on Friday or Saturday night, each which required a special paragraph in the Kiddush. He asked me if I wanted to review it. We went into the house, the two of us. He was ready to sing with me if I needed help. I did it by myself. Elsie told me a few days later, that Abe was very happy that I had remembered it.

Abe was unusually skilled in Hebrew. He could speak English, with little if any accent, and he could read English. He had difficulty with the spelling and the grammar of English. All his life he studied to improve. He used the repetitive method that he had used to learn Hebrew. He took some English courses. He printed long lists of words, phrases, sentences.  He did this studying of English spelling, and grammar, all his life.

Abe was quiet, and didn’t talk a lot, certainly no gossip. The Ipsen family lived one house north of our home. They were Scandinavian, and she made delicious butter cookies. One time Mr Ipsen invited Abe to go to his church. I don’t know if he told him why. I think it was a meeting in their Social Hall. Abe gave a talk, and answered questions from the members. The discussion was why, according to the Bible,  Jews think that Jesus Christ was not the Messiah, who was yet to come, and why they believe that  Jesus was not the son of god, and believe that “god is one”.  That is how the Ipsens learned why we were the only house in the neighborhood without a Christmas tree.

Abe was a proud man. The next door neighbors south of our home, were William and Edith Strickler. We called him Bill, and called her Tickie. They were good neighbors. When I cut my knee falling on something while playing  in an empty lot, and when I had a cut over my eyebrow when the batter threw a bat and it hit me as I was downhill catching in street baseball,  Tickie came over to help me before I went to the doctor for stitches.  Mr. Strickler was an executive with the American Can Company. Whenever he saw Abe, he would say “hello”, and Abe would say “hello Mr. Strickler”. After awhile, Abe asked Mr. Stickler to please say “hello Mr. Kirschenbaum.” The family was surprised he did that, and Mr. Strickler was probably more surprised, but from that time on he greeting Abe that way.

I remember Abe saying “next year in Jerusalem”, at the end of the Passover Seder, which he also said at the end of the Yom Kippur Service . That was also  part of his daily prayer. I am sorry he never was able to travel to Israel. When I, and Carolynn, went to Israel for the first time, I felt I was there for him.

When Annie died, in 1958, at age 83,  Abe made all the arrangements. They had been married 59 years. Abe took it well, getting strength from his strong faith. Abe was  healthy all his life. When he had his final illness, cancer of the breast bone, he was very brave, and never complained. He had numerous blood transfusions in the hospital. As usual, he was as is said in the Bible, “Those who love the Torah have great peace; nothing makes them stumble”.(Psalm 119:165)

Before he died, he made very careful arrangements for his funeral and grave stone, going to Sinai and to Colma. He gave instructions so the Hebrew letters on the grave stone would be exactly as he wanted.  He paid someone, to say Kaddish for him daily for one year after his death, which is an orthodox tradition.

When I went to visit him in the hospital, shortly before he died, he was only semi- conscious. His eyes were closed, Nate brought me into the room, and said “Norman is here”. Abe put his arm straight out, clasped my hand, held it firmly, and for a long time, said “hello Norman”, over and over again,  in a loud voice. I was surprised, but glad we had that one more contact.

He died in 1959, at age 84. I was so fortunate to have know Abe and Annie  from 1927 to 1958,  for 31 years.

Our grandson Andrew Robert Licht was born August 15, 1996.  While Cathy and Ron were not aware of the complete family history at that time, I like to think that Andrew’s Hebrew name is Avrum, in memory of his great-great-grandfather, Abraham Kirshenbaum. Andrew’s middle name was chosen to honor my brother in law, Ron’s Uncle, Robert Suslow.

Fleisher and Haffner Families

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